Last Sunday was a rough day for both me and my son (Ahas). Ahas ended up loosing all wrestling matches in the tournament. I have clearly set both of our expectation not for the wins but for doing his best. I was disappointed because I felt like Ahas was not doing his best. After the tournament I asked him why didn’t he gave his best. That made him so upset. He repeatedly told me that he gave his best. That night I had time to reflect. I came up with better ideas for dealing with his losses.

  1. I should not be the judge of whether Ahas gave his best or not. I can question him to ask if he gave his best and should be ready accept his answer.

  2. I should be appreciative of his effort to get out there and wrestle.

  3. We (Both me and Ahas) need to come up with SMART goals for him to achieve during tournaments.

S - Specific
M - Measurable
A - Agreed Upon
R - Realistic
T - Time based

For example:

1. Not let opponent pin him.
2. Try to score 3 points.
3. Try to stay 1 min before ending this game.

I’m going to give these ideas a try for coming tournament.